Monday, February 20, 2006

So That's Where All My Third Eye Blind CD's Went...

I'm sorry to report that the Torino Olympics have hit yet another roadblock as they struggle to capture the imagination and interest of the world. While the TV ratings tank in a hopeless battle against instant news reporting on the internet, it has now been revealed by anonymous sources that the medals being handed out to the winners at Torino are nothing more than cheap compact discs purchased at a Coconut's going-out-of-business sale. Meanwhile, seeing a chance for a new and more stable business model, the RIAA realized the only way to get a return on the huge advances shelled out for the next Tatu album is to unload all physical storage media in stock on the International Olympic Committee. The IOC seduced by the shiny rainbow reflections and the tinny sound, agreed to buy the discs at $16 a pop - which left the recording industry laughing all the way to the bank.