Tuesday, January 17, 2006

Domesticating the American Male

Listen, I'm a sensitive guy. There's no denying it. I love my family. I am happy to cook dinner on a regular basis. I may not enjoy cleaning the house, but I'm more than willing to do my fair share. Had I been born a few years earlier, I would have clearly voted for the ERA and pulled for Billy Jean King in her match against Bobby Riggs. But now, I've been pushed too far. Yesterday, in what can be described as nothing less than tyranny of the majority, it was decided that for the year 2006, our household will use a calendar featuring pictures of kittens. It was a major blow to my political standing. I tried to filibuster, but was blocked in a cunning procedural move. I even threatened a veto, clearly not within the powers of my office. I must now carve out my place in the body politic, and decide what role I can play as the opposition party. Sigh....